A Slight Mist on the Horizon

 

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A Slight Mist on the Horizon
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 A Slight Mist on the Horizon starts with two hapless lads - myself and Bob sitting in a dinghy on the Thames equiped with a book on how to sail -

 

‘She’s leaning over Bob……BOB, SHE’S LEANING OVER…….for Christ’s SAKE!’

‘I know, I know,…. which page is it?!’

‘I DON’T BLOODY KNOW, OK! I ONLY SKIMMED THE BOOK – I didn’t read EVERY bloody page!!’

            ‘Hell’s bells - typical, if it hasn’t got pictures or pop-ups, you don’t read it!’

‘BOB, for God’s sake, the water’s creeping up the deck on this side man! JUST FIND THE’ PAGE THAT TELLS US HOW TO STOP IT!!’

            Bob quickly flicked through the book as I desperately looked heavenwards towards the sails, towering over us. The water was creeping even further up the deck, the wind briefly gusting to make the dinghy lean over more!

I looked at Bob, trying to remain calm and knowing that shouting at him rarely helped. ‘Try the fizzin’ index man!’

‘What for mate?’

‘How should I know? Leaning over under ‘L’, tipping over under ‘T’, fizzin’ sinking under ‘S’, FOR CHRIST’S SAKE - I DON’T KNOW!  - Or how about ‘P’, for complete and utter PANIC! Just find out how to STOP IT; and at the same time, WHY are we so far from the river bank? I can’t even get out AND FIZZIN’ WALK, FOR CHRIST’S SAKE!’ My cool had gone again!!

Bob turned to me, a cynical expression on his face - ‘But boats are supposed to lean over……look at the pictures!’

‘Yes, but they appear to be MOVING FORWARD and have bow waves at the same time! WE just lean over and twist round, BACK THE BLOODY WAY WE CAME!’

And before I had finished my speech, the dinghy had taken my suggestion and weather cocked yet again - the sails shook and the boat veered round, so that the wind came over the opposite side and she started to lean over again – only this time, the other way! Which put us on the downward side and even closer to the water!

‘Bloody book’s no good, l can’t find what to do next; we got the sails up ok, cast off, shipped the rudder……all fine’

I gave Bob a glaring look!

‘Ok, so that was the wrong way round, we should have fitted the rudder first’, Bob shrugged, ‘I guess it may have helped a bit with the initial steering, but we got away from the river bank alright and sheeted the sails in - so now what?

.................and finishes  -

Cherry barged her way through between the open-mouthed girls, bent down and undid ‘Maggie’s’ bow rope and at the same time signalled Bob to undo the stern rope. She jumped on ‘Maggie’s’ deck and hopped gracefully down into the cockpit where she helped me inboard, jumped from ‘Maggie’ into the dinghy, put the dinghy’s outboard into reverse and pulled ‘Maggie’ away from the jetty – just like that!– no fuss, no bother – in complete control!

After she had towed us away from the jetty where Manky and Clarissa stood open mouthed and speechless, Cherry turned the dinghy’s engine off, came aboard, undid the mooring rope holding the dinghy to our side, transferred it aft and then helped me get ‘Maggie’s’ outboard going. Bob sat quietly nursing his nose!

 ‘Seems like you two boys need rescuing again! What was all that Cherry business about – you two found another Cherry?!

‘Oh no!’ I said

‘Defffffinitely dot!’ murmured Bob

‘So, you weren’t taking my name in vain?’

‘Oh no!’ – maybe not in vain, I thought, just in lust!!

‘Deffffinitely dot!!’

‘Good! – fancy a trip down to Sonning?’

We both nodded vigorously.

As we set off, I reflected – our dreams of sailing the Atlantic to those far-off islands, still remained far into the distance, but after our adventures building and launching the ‘Crapper’ and then playing around and learning to sail on the Thames, we had progressed and the dreams had started to take on more shape and had become just that little bit more formed – still a slight mist on the horizon, but definitely there. And I may still be confused about which buttons to press when it came to matters involving the fairer sex and Bob may have a bloody nose after his close high-speed contact with Clarissa……but Cherry was back!........ YES!!

............and in between, the pair of us travel through a series of sometimes disastrous adventures and mishaps in our bid to learn about boats, sailing and, of course, girls! ............

Each chapter is illustrated by a couple of cartoons drawn by the author Paul Fisher - there a total of 28 - here are a few:-

A Slight Mist on the Horizon can be purchased in 3 formats:-

 As a CD in down-loadable Word.doc and pdf format with interactive Contents pages - cost £4 plus postage.
 Or purchase as a pdf file to be sent as an email attachment (no postage) - make sure we have your email address when you order.
 
 As a Kindle book for e-readers - click on the image below to go direct to Amazon Kindle  As a paperback - click on the image below to go direct to Amazon  

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Sterling cost £4 + £2 P&P  in the UK- (Europe Airmail is £4, Elsewhere Airmail is £5). US Dollar cost is $16 incl. Airmail.

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